For the historical record: Janet Reno.
Obit watch: November 7, 2016.
November 7th, 2016Your NFL loser update: week 9, 2016
November 7th, 2016NFL teams that still have a chance to go 0-16:
Cleveland
Maybe there’s something to be said for the theory that rising baseball fortunes are tied to falling football fortunes and vice versa.
Lawrence suggested that I also do an NBA loser update, now that the season has started. My response: “The season has started?”
Okay, okay. NBA teams that still have a chance to go 0-82:
Philadelphia
New Orleans
Also: all gambling debts have been paid, in front of witnesses. There’s even photo documentation, which may be posted later.
Edited to add: Photographic proof.

Why not have a drink?
November 3rd, 2016I might have to pick up a bottle of Millard Fillmore United States Brandy, if I find it in a local liquor store.
Granted, it isn’t quite “Look for the smiling face of Archduke Ferdinand on every bottle!”, but history has its own set of charms.
Also by way of the NYT:
The Seelbach is named after the Seelbach Hotel (today the Seelbach Hilton), a storied century-old lodging in downtown Louisville, Ky., that is mentioned briefly in “The Great Gatsby.” Shortly after being put in charge of the hotel’s bar and restaurant operations in 1995, Mr. Seger declared that he had discovered a recipe for a pre-Prohibition cocktail that was once the hotel’s signature drink. He tested it, liked it and put it on the menu.
The news media soon picked up on the tale, and within a few years, the Seelbach cocktail was regarded as a rescued classic. It’s a tantalizing back story, one that has charmed cocktail writers and aficionados for years, and there’s only one thing wrong with it: None of it is true.
The Seventh Seal.
November 3rd, 2016Revelation 8, verses 1-5:
When He opened the seventh seal, there was silence in heaven for about half an hour. And I saw the seven angels who stand before God, and to them were given seven trumpets. Then another angel, having a golden censer, came and stood at the altar. He was given much incense, that he should offer it with the prayers of all the saints upon the golden altar which was before the throne. And the smoke of the incense, with the prayers of the saints, ascended before God from the angel’s hand. Then the angel took the censer, filled it with fire from the altar, and threw it to the earth. And there were noises, thunderings, lightnings, and an earthquake.
You know, I kind of like Steve Goodman. I think we can do with one more musical interlude, before we retire this song for another 100 years.
And I hope he’s smiling somewhere in heaven.
Edited to add: Tam. Office seems kind of dusty this morning.
Edited to add 2: I had no idea Bob Newhart was on Twitter.
The fella at the next table was nice enough to help me hold the flag after the Cubs won!!! Go Cubs and fly the W!!#GoCubsGo #FlytheW #Game7 pic.twitter.com/QJVaPgOTDH
— Bob Newhart (@BobNewhart) November 2, 2016
The billy goat is dead!! As I've said, from the beginning, I'm getting too old for this! #GoCubsGo #FlytheW pic.twitter.com/iCOL6A3s1i
— Bob Newhart (@BobNewhart) November 3, 2016
(Hattip: Mike the Musicologist.)
Norv!
November 2nd, 2016Norv Turner out as offensive coordinator of the Minnesota Vikings.
This is being presented as a “resignation”, and it may very well be one. It just seems weird and noteworthy.
Short notes on film: October 30, 2016.
October 30th, 2016Since we’re talking about movies anyway, I’d like to make another recommendation. And this one won’t cost you anything.
Last Saturday, it was just Lawrence and I for movie night, and we didn’t want to burn “John Carpenter’s The Thing” with just the two of us there. We had trouble settling on something to watch. We tried “The Architects of Fear” episode of “The Outer Limits”, but neither of us could really get into the episode: it seemed too talky and too relationship oriented, and we turned it off after about 10 minutes. (Also, man, they, like, totally ripped that plot off from “Watchmen”, right?)
We tried watching David Cronenberg’s first movie, “Stereo” (which is on the Criterion disc of “Scanners”) and that was one hot pretentious mess. I think we also made it about 10 minutes into that as well.
We ended up watching, for our feature presentation, a movie I’ve been wanting to see, but which may not technically qualify for Halloween viewing. It is kind of creepy, and falls into the category of “film noir”, so if you’re willing to extend Halloween creepy to noir…(says the guy who has gone in costume as Sam Spade, complete with Maltese Falcon).
The movie in question is 1948’s “He Walked By Night” directed by some guy named Alfred L. Werker (who was supposedly either “assisted by” or “fired from the film and had it taken over by” Anthony “fired from ‘Spartacus'” Mann).
Richard Basehart – excuse me – “Richard Basehart!” – is a burglar specializing in thefts of electronics. At the start of the movie, he shoots and ends up killing a police officer, triggering a massive manhunt by the LAPD. The police lure him into a trap at one point, but he shoots his way out (leaving another police officer paralyzed). The LAPD continues to pursue him, but things are complicated by the fact that he has no criminal record, changes his methods to throw off the police, and almost seems to be one step ahead of them…like he was a former police officer or something.
(Possible spoilers ahead.)
This is often cited as a hugely influential noir film. It is a little stagey (but it was also 1948) and there’s a lot of stuff in it that feels today like clichés. (“I’m taking you off the case because you’re too close to it!”) The thing is, those weren’t clichés in 1948: this is one of the origin points for a lot of what you see in later noir films and procedurals well into today.
A very young (and very thin) Jack Webb plays a police lab technician:
(“You will believe a man can use a slide projector!”) There’s an interesting story behind that: while he was working on this movie, Webb became friends with LAPD Detective Sergeant Marty Wynn, who was working as a technical advisor on the film. One thing led to another, and, well…Webb and Wynn’s friendship and discussions ultimately led to the creation of “Dragnet” (which shares a lot of DNA with this movie.)
Even with all the staginess and talking, this is, in my opinion, a remarkably compelling movie. It is short (one hour nineteen minutes) but something is going on in almost every frame to advance the plot. And there’s also a feeling of some real stakes at play here: any of the good guys (or an innocent bystander) could get killed at any minute. As Ivan G Shreve Jr. notes in his writeup at “Thrilling Days of Yesteryear”:
There’s also a lot of really good cinematography: the use of underlighting and shadows to convey a sense of danger and dread is top-notch. And the crime is broken somewhat by lab work (Jack Webb’s role isn’t trivial), but more so by dogged, unrelenting police footwork.
The movie is actually based on a real incident, the Erwin “Machine Gun” Walker case, and it is surprising how closely it sticks to the facts. Walker, like Basehart’s protagonist, was an electronics expert who stole to finance his experimentation. He carried around homemade nitroglycerin that he’d carefully desensitized (to make it safer to transport) had a pretty extensive arsenal (mostly stolen from military armories), experimented with making his own fake driver’s licenses and license plates, and he had worked before WWII as a police dispatcher/radio operator.
There are a few small deviations from historical fact, and one omission: Walker shot and wounded the two LAPD detectives first, the police officer he killed was a highway patrolman (not an LAPD officer), and Walker wasn’t gunned down in an LA sewer. Walker was actually captured alive and sentenced to death, though that sentence was never carried out. One thing the movie doesn’t touch on – perhaps it was too early – was that Walker was emotionally disturbed by his wartime experiences: part of the motivation for his crimes was that he wanted to build a radio-based device that would turn metal to powder, use that device to force the governments of the world to raise military pay, and thus make war “too expensive” to be fought.
You can watch “He Walked By Night” on Amazon Video, and there are several DVD editions of it. Interestingly, though, the film is in the public domain in the United States: you can also download it for free from the Internet Archive.
If you like noir films, or Jack Webb, or Richard Basehart, I recommend you do so. I think you will find this movie amply repays your investment of time and bandwidth.
Not forgotten, just disappeared. (#1 in a series)
October 30th, 2016I’ve noted that if you’re going through Hollywood history, you keep running into people who had short but interesting careers. Maybe, like Zita Johann, they were in the movies for just a few years, then went off to do something else. Maybe they were only in one movie ever: but wow, their performance in that one movie was something to behold. (I have someone specifically in mind in this category, but you’ll have to wait for that one.)
I’ve also threatened to start doing a regular series about these people, and now seems to be as good a time as any to kick it off. Let’s talk about Kathleen Burke.
She was 19 years old and working in Chicago as a dental assistant when she won a Paramount Pictures sponsored contest. She was announced as the winner on September 29, 1932. The first film she was in was released in December of 1932 (according to Wikipedia and IMDB). Seems like a really, really, short production schedule: it makes me wonder if those sources are right. Or maybe they filmed certain parts of the movie first, and then just backfilled the sections she was in? Interesting question.
After that first movie, she was in a fair amount of stuff between 1933 and 1938. Most of it I’ve never heard of, though “Murders at the Zoo” is described as “particularly dark for its time”. She was also in “The Lives of a Bengal Lancer” though I can’t tell how big her part was.
By 1938, she’d retired. She died in 1980: she was 66.
What about that contest? And what about that first movie?
Well, there were (allegedly) 60,000 entrants in the contest. And Ms. Burke, as the winner, got the role of…
…Lola, “The Panther Woman” in “Island of Lost Souls”.

“Island of Lost Souls” is the first (real) adaptation of H. G. Wells “The Island of Dr. Moreau”. (I add that qualifier as there were apparently two short silent adaptations before it.) I want to say it is probably the best, but I confess: I have not seen most of the other ones (including, tragically, the Brando/Kilmer/Frankenheimer version). We watched “Island of Lost Souls” around Halloween last year: it may just have been the state of mind I was in, but I found it genuinely interesting and creepy.
And Ms. Burke is quite memorable in it. I wouldn’t say she was “attractive” in a conventional sense, but “Lola, The Panther Woman” did have something going on for her. Actually, pretty much everyone in this movie is good. There’s an excellent Criterion edition of “Island of Lost Souks” that’s packed with extras, including interviews with David J. Skal and members of Devo. (“Island of Lost Souls” was, I gather, a big influence on the band.)
(Damn, those Ohio boys really get around. But I digress.)
I commend “Island of Lost Souls”, and Ms. Burke’s work as “The Panther Girl” to your attention. It may be a little late this year, but perhaps next year, when the pumpkins start showing up in church parking lots and the air turns cold, you can start a fire, plug in the Criterion blu-ray, and admire Ms. Burke and her work.
Your NFL loser update: week 8, 2016
October 30th, 2016NFL teams that still have a chance to go 0-16:
Cleveland
But hey, the Indians are doing well. Indeed, it seems like there’s a very good chance that I’ll end up owing Lawrence $5…
Random links: October 30, 2016.
October 30th, 2016A handful of random links that I’ve accumulated over the past few days. Some of these are arguably appropriate for the season, some not…
By way of Lawrence, the first air hijacking.
By way of Hognose over at the Weaponsman blog, a retrospecitve from Philly.com on a crime story I’d never heard of: 75 years ago, a spaghetti salesman and his co-conspirators murdered somewhere between 50 and 100 people with arsenic. It was your typical life insurance/double indemnity scam, distinguished perhaps only by the number of victims.
By way of Stuff from Hsoi, through Lawrence: Massad Ayoob’s latest “Ayoob Files” entry for American Handgunner is about John Daub’s shooting incident. Briefly, Mr. Daub (who instructs part-time for KR Training) shot and killed a man who kicked down the front door of his house while he was inside with his wife and kids:
For the record: NYT obit for Jack Chick.
By way of the News@Ycombinator Twitter: ESPN lost 621,000 subscribers in one month.
2017: 86 million subscribers
2018: 83 million subscribers
2019: 80 million subscribers
2020: 77 million subscribers
2021: 74 million subscribersAt 74 million subscribers — Outkick’s projection for 2021 based on the past five years of subscriber losses — ESPN would be bringing in just over $6.2 billion a year in yearly subscriber fees at $7 a month. At $8 a month, assuming the subscriber costs per month keeps climbing, that’s $7.1 billion in subscriber revenue. Both of those numbers are less than the yearly rights fees cost.
On a personal note, my mother is planning to dump cable in the next few days, and I don’t even think she realizes that she’s paying $80 a year for the NFL and other crap she doesn’t watch on ESPN, and another $30 a year for the NBA (which she also doesn’t watch).
NYT obit for John Zacherle, aka “Zacherley”, one of the early TV horror movie hosts.
I didn’t grow up in the NYC/Philly area, so I never saw “Zacherley”, but the obit got me to thinking about him and Ghoulardi and all those other guys who seem to have died off or disappeared with the increasing corporatization of television. I missed this when I was young: as I’ve noted before, I was culturally deprived as a child. Also, I’m not sure we had any “horror hosts” in Houston. I do remember “Captain Harold’s Theater of the Sky”, but I don’t recall that fitting into the “horror host” genre. (Also, I would have sworn it was called “Captain Harold’s Theater of the Air” when I was growing up: is nostalgia a moron, or did the name change at some point?) This is another one of those things where I almost regret not watching those people when I was young, so that I could have grown up to be a famous horror writer with groupies and a cocaine problem, but I digress.
There is a guy on one of the nostalgia TV channels on Saturday night who seems to be trying to revive the Zacherley/Ghoulardi schtick. I don’t even know his name, but we’ve caught a few minutes of his show during movie night at Lawrence’s. The 51-year-old me says, frankly, he’s not very good. The 11-year-old boy inside me says, “Well, yeah, you think he’s not very good. But you’re a jaded 51-year-old man who is incapable of experiencing joy, and can watch things like…well, like “John Carpenter’s The Thing” anytime you feel like it. What about me? When you were my age, you would have lapped this stuff up like a thirsty man in the desert, bad puns and all!” The 51-year-old me thinks the 11-year-old me is being a little unfair with that “incapable of experiencing joy” comment, but he does have a point.
With all the old “horror hosts” dying away, and nobody seeming to replace them, who or what is fueling the imaginations of the 11-year-olds out there? What are they going to write or draw or film when they grow up? Who is educating them in the classics like “Island of Lost Souls” (about which, more, later), even if those classics are kind of chopped up?
What have we lost?
Noted.
October 30th, 2016I voted early today.
There was almost no line. This was at around 12:30 PM at the Randall’s in Lakeway.
Just a data point.
Actually, they can read your poker face.
October 26th, 2016Or at least your cards.
This is a presentation that I overlooked from DEFCON 24, but the authors have now been blogging.
For somewhere between $1,300 and $5,000, you can buy a device that helps you cheat at poker.
The technology is quite interesting. It isn’t just “disguised” as a phone: the device is actually a fully functional Android phone, with a custom ROM and app that controls the cheating portion.
How does it work? Hidden camera, concealed infrared LEDs, and…
What makes the whole thing work is the use of a special deck in which the four edges of each card are marked with IR-absorbing ink. As a result, when this marked deck is illuminated by the IR LEDs, the spots of ink absorb the IR, creating a sequence of black spots…
The sequence of black spots created by the IR illumination, illustrated in the photo above, is read remotely by the cheating device to infer a card’s suit and value. You can think of those markings as invisible barcodes.
So yes, you do need to slip in a marked deck. But the people who will sell you the phone will also sell you pre-marked decks, which are designed to look like they haven’t been messed with. And apparently the phone will pair with Bluetooth based audio and haptic feedback devices, so you don’t even have to be looking at the display.
And yes, because it is based on marked cards, it will work with card games other than poker, too. (High-end bridge cheating? Chris Christie, call your office, please. Sorry, little joke there.)
The post that’s up now is just the first one in a promised series: I’ll try to link to the other ones as they go up.
Obit watch: October 26, 2016.
October 26th, 2016Bob Hoover, possibly the greatest pilot ever, has passed away at the age of 94.
I don’t think that statement is hyperbole, though I suspect I might get arguments from some people.
Even General Yeager, perhaps the most famous test pilot of his generation, was humbled by Mr. Hoover, describing him in the foreword to Mr. Hoover’s 1996 autobiography, “Forever Flying,” as “the greatest pilot I ever saw.”
The World War II hero Jimmy Doolittle, an aviation pioneer of an earlier generation, called Mr. Hoover “the greatest stick-and-rudder man that ever lived.”
“Well, if he was such a hot stick, why wasn’t he the one who broke the sound barrier?” Answer: because he got crosswise with his superiors for doing some unauthorized low-level flying, so they put him in the chase plane for Yeager. When Chuck freakin’ Yeager says, “I want you to have my back on this one”, well…there’s your sign.
“Nazis?” Yes:
As a pilot with the 52nd Fighter Group, based in Corsica, Mr. Hoover, a lieutenant, flew 58 successful missions before his Spitfire fighter was shot down by the Luftwaffe in February 1944. He spent 16 months in Stalag Luft I, a prisoner of war camp in Germany reserved for Allied pilots.
Mr. Hoover and a friend escaped from the camp in the chaotic final days of the war, according to his memoir. Commandeering an aircraft from a deserted Nazi base, they flew it to freedom in the newly liberated Netherlands, only to be chased by pitchfork-wielding Dutch farmers enraged by the plane’s German markings.
He went on to become a hugely popular performer on the air show circuit:
Mr. Hoover’s trademark maneuver on the show circuit was a death-defying plunge with both engines cut off; he would use the hurtling momentum to pull the plane up into a loop at the last possible moment.
But his stunts were not foolhardy. Each involved painstaking preparation and rational calculation of risk. “A great many former friends of mine are no longer with us simply because they cut their margins too close,” he once said.
I regret that I never saw him perform: somehow, it just never seemed that he came anywhere near me in Texas. (There’s video of part of his routine on the NYT page.)
I did read, and liked, Forever Flying. There’s a story in there that I sometimes pull out and tell to younger technicians who have messed up and feel bad about it.
The story goes: Mr. Hoover was flying back from an airshow and stopped to have his plane refueled. He took off again, and very shortly after takeoff, the engines quit. By dint of superior airmanship, he managed to land the plane: nobody on board was killed or even injured, but the plane was pretty much a total loss.
When Mr. Hoover removed the gas cap, he found out what the problem was: as I recall, the guy who filled the plane put in the wrong type of fuel. (I want to say he put in jet fuel instead of aviation gasoline, but don’t quote me on that: I don’t have the book in front of me.)
So Mr. Hoover hikes back to the airfield, and the guy who filled up the plane is staring off into the distance looking like the whole world has come down on him. Because he realizes he screwed up Bob Hoover’s plane.
And Mr. Hoover comes over, puts his arm around the guy, and says, “Son, I just want you to know: nobody was hurt. The plane got bent, but we can replace that. I have another plane coming in tomorrow morning, and when it gets here, I want you to be the one who puts fuel in it…
…because I know you’re never going to make that mistake again.”
By all accounts I’ve read and heard, he was a pretty kind gentleman, too. 94 is a good run, but the world is still a smaller, lesser place today.
Obit watch: October 25, 2016.
October 25th, 2016The A/V Club is reporting (based on a Facebook post by his family) the death of Christian comics impresario Jack Chick.
A long time ago, I ordered a complete set of all the Chick comics (at the time) and some of the Alberto Rivera comics. I think I still have those in a box somewhere…
For the historical record: Tom Hayden.
Firing watch.
October 23rd, 2016Tim DeRuyter out as football coach at Fresno State.
Heck, I didn’t even know Fresno State had a football team. They were 1-7 so far this season. DeRuyter was 30-30 overall.
Musical interlude.
October 23rd, 2016It has been a while since I’ve done one of these, so why not now?
But it does bother me a little that I can’t find a version of the song with the original lyrics.
