So, it has come to this. Kansas City and San Francisco. Again.
We’re a little bit disappointed, but honestly, Detroit has nothing to be ashamed of this season. They played well, and we hope this continues next year.
In other news, it’s Baltimore, gentlemen. The football gods will not save you.
After the jump, this week’s Tuesday Morning Quarterback (which you won’t be able to read in its entirety unless you subscribe to “All Predictions Wrong”, which is the actual title of Gregg Easterbrook’s Substack)…
What happened to Baltimore’s run game?
TMQ does exactly what we expected TMQ to do: justify Detroit going for it on 4th and short. Even though they lost the game.
It might just be Stockholm Syndrome, but we’re actually inclined to agree with TMQ here: statistically, those were the right calls, even though they didn’t work out. But why did they pass instead of running?
Also, a new TMQ cliche “immutable law”: “Field Goals Are Not Chopped Liver“.
Tight ends. Offensive lines win games. Belichick. Football dominates TV ratings.
By comparison, the highest-rated non-sports TV show, Yellowstone, averages about 12 million viewers.
Seriously? We had no idea. (We haven’t actually watched an episode of “Yellowstone”, not wanting to pay for streaming. And we know it is being re-run on one of the broadcast networks, but can’t remember which one. We would say “Nor do we care” but we have watched some “Yellowstone” clips on the ‘Tube, and it looks possibly interesting…)
The return of another TMQ trope that we haven’t seen in quite a while: Sunday Ticket bashing. For those who don’t remember, TMQ had a real problem with Sunday Ticket only being available on DirecTV, back in the day.
And this, in turn, segues into TMQ’s continued crusade against events in “publicly funded stadia” being copyrightable.
Saylor Twift. We have seen some speculation that the winner of the election is going to be…whoever she endorses.
1. We doubt she will endorse anyone, and risk making half of her fans angry. Fandom is fickle, and can turn on a dime against you.
2. If she has that much power to influence an election, maybe it is time to call this grand experiment over and start again with a new form of government.
(Also, 137 words on “You Gotta Be a Football Hero”. Though some of those are TMQ quoting the lyrics to this 91 year old song.)
Next Tuesday, the “Tuesday Morning Quarterback Non-Quarterback Non-Running Back National Football League Most Valuable Player” award.
Stats. Who is Mina Kimes, and why should we care what she says? (That’s us asking, not TMQ.)
Sweet: oddly enough, Detroit. Sour: Baltimore. Mixed: Baltimore-Detroit (specifically, Zay Flowers).
Jim Harbaugh skedaddled. Credit where credit is due: “skedaddled” is a fun word to say. But we wish TMQ had given more consideration to whether Jim Harbaugh is going to make it in the NFL. Not just because we hate the Chargers, but (as TMQ has so often pointed out), college coaching is mostly a game of recruiting, and anybody with a pulse can win at least six games a year. Coaching in the NFL is a different kind of coaching altogether.
Going for it on fourth down works. Now let’s see more two-point conversion attempts. (That’s TMQ, not us.)
Cool story, bro: Buffalo fans have donated $300,000 to Tyler Bass’s charity. (For those not in the know, Bass missed a game-tying field goal against Kansas City.) And this isn’t the first time Buffalo’s done this, nor are they the only team to have done something like this.
More on the Washington Post and “there aren’t enough black coaches, except for all the black coaches”.
Space. The final frontier. For rock collecting.
Viewer mail: the true meaning of a “double double”.
The fact that economists predict things will be fine is what scares me.
Coaching scapegoats.
TMQ has a retrospective obit for Herman Raucher, author of “Summer of ’42” (the screenplay and the book).
Weseals. Did you know that the Norwegian Minister of Education was exposed as a plagiarist and resigned? Neither did we.
“Adventures in Officiating”.
We’re not much into conspiracy theories about the NFL. First of all, there would be too many people involved in game fixing on a league level for it to be kept secret. Secondly, down that path lies madness. But KC-SF in the Superb Owl? Again? With all the Saylor Twift crud going on? It does make us wonder.
“Single Worst Performance of the Season – So Far.” B’more. Why. Don’t. They. Run? Why. DON’T. THEY. RUN!
And that’s a wrap for this week, folks. Next week: the most boring week in sports. Plus, of course, the “Tuesday Morning Quarterback Non-Quarterback Non-Running Back National Football League Most Valuable Player” award. And, we hope, a minimum of content about She Who We Will Not Name Here.