Archive for the ‘Primates’ Category

Rhesus pieces.

Monday, July 10th, 2017

Semi-serious question for the huddled masses yearning to breathe free that are my readers:

What gun for aggressive monkeys with Herpes B?

(An AR in .223, maybe? Or a high-capacity 9mm, if you’re worried about bullet travel?)

(I’m not suggesting that he sit on the back porch and pick off monkeys at a distance. I like monkeys. But if the kids are in the backyard on their swing set, and a swarm of aggressive virus-carrying monkeys shows up, what’s the best response?)

The continuing chimpanzee crisis.

Friday, June 29th, 2012

A University of Texas at San Antonio graduate student is in critical condition after two chimpanzees mauled him at the Jane Goodall Institute Chimpanzee Eden in South Africa.

More:

Witnesses said two chimpanzees grabbed Oberle by his feet and pulled him under a perimeter fence and into their enclosure, then dragged him almost a half-mile.

I hate every ape I see, from chim-pan-A to chimpanzee…

Wednesday, June 27th, 2012

L.A. Zoo visitors watched in horror as a baby chimpanzee was killed Tuesday afternoon by an adult male chimpanzee.

Administrative announcement.

Tuesday, June 12th, 2012

WCD now has an official mascot.

No, not the drama llama: we are content to leave that for other bloggers.

The official mascot of WCD is the slow loris. How can you not like a venomous primate? If only they could be genetically engineered to fly and kill bureaucrats.

Obit watch: December 28, 2011.

Wednesday, December 28th, 2011

Cheetah.

…sanctuary volunteer Ron Priest says that when the chimp didn’t like what was going on, he would throw feces.

Don’t we all pretty much want to live our lives like that? Doesn’t that explain the appeal of “House”?

Edited to add: The Cheetah that died may not have been the real Cheetah.

Nasty, big, pointy teeth!

Wednesday, September 14th, 2011

Carry your damn guns, people.